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Letter from Elisabeth
Two of my children are in heaven.
One is in
heaven because God took her home. Little
Katie was born with Trisomy 13 and lived for only two months.
My other child is in heaven because I killed him. I was a teenager, and when
I found out I was pregnant, I aborted so I would not have to tell my
parents.
I am writing because I want you to know which choice I regret, and which
choice I delight in.
I look back on Katie’s life with deep joy and satisfaction. I wasn’t a
perfect mom even for those two months; there are things I’d do differently
if given the chance! Yet I look back with the satisfaction of knowing how
much I loved her and how well I cared for her. I think of her in God’s
presence - in the presence of the Living God! - and I am filled with deep
joy.
My other child is in God’s presence too, but that thought sends me to my
knees. The law says it was my choice to make, but I knew even back then
that life and death is God’s business. I made a decision no human has the
right to make, the decision to end the life of an innocent child.
Five years ago, when my husband and I found out our baby had Trisomy 13, we
struggled with the thought that our child might suffer. Maybe, we thought,
it would be selfish to go through with the birth. Maybe the compassionate
thing would be to abort before she ever had to struggle.
Then we remembered that plenty of people suffer and yet still want to live
as long as they can. Who were we to decide that she should die so she might
not suffer?
I also thought about what might be ahead for us. I knew that some Trisomy
children live for many years, and I realized she might need total care. I
worried about the strain on our finances and on our marriage. Would we be
able to handle it?
Here I was, years after my teenage abortion, facing the decision to abort
again, and just like the time before, for selfish reasons. Once again, I
was afraid of the way a tiny, innocent baby might change my life. Would I
be able to handle it?
Over the course of Katie’s pregnancy, I thought a lot about this
question. What did I really fear might happen to me if I couldn’t handle it?
Was I afraid of having a nervous breakdown? Was I afraid I might die?
I decided to handle the challenges the same way anybody does--by walking through them
one step at a time.
Life and death is God's business. You can
handle what's ahead. Your job is simple: just love your children and take
care of them the best you can.
By Elisabeth Slotkin (mom to Katie)
Contact Elisabeth at: (904) 730-9732
(904) 476-6673 (cell) Call anytime
eslotkin@comcast.net |
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| Physician's Home
Not Compatible with
Life, a diary of keeping Daniel
By Kylie Sheffield
Prenatal
Diagnosis Information Package -
Compiled by Kylie Sheffield (mum of Daniel, full
Trisomy 13) in consultation with families on this web site |
| LINKS FOR PROFESSIONALS FROM
MEDICAL AUTHORITIES |
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Lethal Language Lethal Decisions
By Tracy K. Koogler, Benjamin S. Wilfond, and Lainie Friedman Ross
©
The Hastings Center. Reprinted with
permission. This article originally appeared in the Hastings Center Report,
vol. 33, no. 2 (2003),” Editorial email:
editorial@thehastingscenter.org.
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Intensive cardiac management in patients with trisomy 13 or trisomy 18
Am J Med Genet Part A.
*Intensive cardiac management consisting of pharmacological intervention for
ductal patency and cardiac surgery was demonstrated to improve survival in
patients with trisomy 13 or trisomy 18 in this series. Therefore, we suggest
that this approach is a treatment option for cardiac lesions associated with
these trisomies. These data are helpful for clinicians and families to
consider in the optimal treatment of patients with these trisomies.
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Show Me the Money: Financial Considerations in Responding to Parental
Wishes.
Benjamin S. Wilfond, MD,
head of Ethics of Seattle Children's Hospital
Watch the Webcast

View presentation (PDF 425KB)
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Noninitiation or Withdrawal of Intensive Care for High-Risk
Newborns
From the American Academy of Pediatrics Committee on Fetus and Newborn
Organizational Principles to Guide and Define the Child Health Care System
and/or
Improve the Health of All Children
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Amniocentesis: The Struggle to Choose
 By Wendy Hogarth, Mother to Jared diagnosed with trisomy 13 at birth.
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Post-Viability Abortions
 Patricia Lee June, M.D, Pediatrician and PPL board member
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WHAT TESTS SHOULD BE DONE
ONCE MY CHILD IS DIAGNOSED
WITH TRISOMY 13? By Christine Nelson MD, Pediatric Hospitalist
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The parents' journey: continuing a pregnancy after a diagnosis of Patau's
syndrome By Louise Locock,
senior qualitative researcher,
Jane & Jon Crawford,
parents of Benjamin
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Values in End-of-Life Decision-Making: Some Implications for People with
Disability By Jennifer Fitzgerald , Barrister of the Supreme Court of NSW.
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Giving Terminally Ill Babies and Their Families an Alternative to
Abortion
 By Liz Townsend
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PRENATAL
DIAGNOSIS: FEARS & EXPECTATIONS
 by Agneta Sutton, Head of Research The Centre for Bioethics and Public Policy
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Post-viability abortions
 by Pediatrician Patricia Lee June, M.D.
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Clinical Case - Patau Syndrome and Perinatal Decision Making
 Ethics Journal of the American Medical Association May 2005, Volume 7
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Trisomy 13 Facts
&
A Guide for
Professionals
From the Support Organization for Trisomy 18, 13 and Related Disorders
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A
Different Kind of Crisis Pregnancy: When There is “Bad News” About Baby By Monica Rafie
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Understanding Grief: A Component of Neonatal Palliative Care
By
Tricia L. Romesberg, MSN, CNNP
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Disability
Matters - Blog - Institute for the Study of Disabilities & Bioethics Dr.
Mark Mostert, from Johannesburg, South Africa, is co director of Regent
University’s Institute for the Study of Disability and Bioethics.
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| Articles on Eugenics, Ethics,
Selective Abortion, Selective Induction and the killing of Disabled Children |
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Personal Qualms Don't Count: Hospital Forces Nurses To Participate In Genetic
Terminations by MARNIE KO
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ESSAYS BY TRISOMY 13 PARENTS
Free
literature to share with your patients |
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WHEN WHAT SEEMS BROKEN IS
PERFECT
By Barbara Farlow (Annie's Mom)
The decision to accept
disability:
One family’s perspective
By Barbara Farlow BEngSci MBA
A Letter to: Pediatric
Physicians, OB-Gynecologists, Geneticists & Healthcare Providers, from ThereseAnn - A parent of a
Trisomy 13 child
How Our
Babies have changed our Lives by Maria Demers
A Mother's
letter to newly diagnosed Families
(Printable to have on hand in your office to give to patients) by
Julie Sexton
Message to
All Obstetricians & Perinatologists
Message to All Physicians,
Specialists, and Doctors Alike by Mary Mabeus
Letters to Physicians -Trisomy 13 Survival Tactics -Patients
Plan of Care - Faith in Action -Considerations in Making a
Specified Plan of Care by Janina E. Arritola
How can anyone say that
these children do not contribute to society, therefore what is the point?
by Melissa Roy
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| Website & Articles for Surgical Procedures for those opting for medical intervention for specific abnormalities.
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What is an Omphalocele?
The method of delivery will be discussed with you as the
time gets closer. The method of delivery is dependent on the
size of the omphalocele. If the size is quite large and
especially if the liver is involved, the doctor may prefer
to do a cesarean section (c-section) to avoid the risk of
injury to the liver. Otherwise, the preferred method of
delivery is vaginal."
Decompressive cranioplasty may improve the clinical symptoms
of children with mild trigonocephaly and intracranial pressure:
report of 56 patients - June 5 2004
Mild trigonocephaly with clinical symptoms:
analysis of surgical results in 65 patients
- June 5 2004 |
| Termination, Abortion the only choice?
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(A must read for Physician’s who advise
parents after early testing and prenatal diagnosis) These women share the immense pain a termination has left on their lives.
When counseled by Professionals they were offered no hope. They were not given
the option of carrying to term and holding their child, if even briefly. Nor
offered the compassionate support this diagnosis requires. Instead these women
felt they had to make the heart breaking choice to end their child’s life.
- - -
A Story of Regret - "Maybe if the professionals we had
talked to had given us more information we would have made a different choice.
To this day, I still live with the pain of the choices we made. Trisomy needs to
have a bigger voice and all the professionals need to be more open minded and
not so much on terminating"
~Katie -
Full Story
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"It is a choice I cannot live with to this day. I look at these pictures,
read your stories and my heart aches. Since I had a D&E, I never even got to
see or hold my daughter."
~Laurie-Beth
Full Story
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After experiencing the effects of an abortion with a previous pregnancy,
Elizabeth shares her experiences with carrying to term a child with Patau
Syndrome - Trisomy 13.
~Elisabeth Slotkin
Full Story
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This is a portion of a speech given by Eagle Forum Alaska President,
Debbie Joslin on the capitol steps, January 22, 2008
Full Story |
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Click here to
download printable LivingWithTrisomy13.org "awareness cards." |
Living with Trisomy 13
Focused on prayerful support and gifts of love
to those touched by a Trisomy 13 child.
Inspired By An Angel
Attn: LivingWithTrisomy13
15802 Springdale St.. #68
Huntington Beach, CA 92649
info@LivingWithTrisomy13.org
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Text and graphics ©
LivingWithTrisomy13.org 2005-2007
All information found on this site was submitted to
us directly by the families and used on this site with their permission. |
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Cover photo of Pamela Sullivan & her precious daughter Maria, copyright Pamela
Sullivan 2004, used with permission. |
If We Hold On Together Song Copyright 2002 by Patricia Welch, Ltd. All rights reserved.
Used with permission.
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*Disclaimer
All material on this site reflects our personal journey with raising a Trisomy
13 child. It is not meant to replace any medical advise of a professional
familiar with your specific condition. The personal journeys of any parents on
this site are only their opinions and their own journey with having a Trisomy 13
child. You should consult with your own physician or other medical professional
regarding the opinions or recommendations expressed within these pages as to
your own child's symptoms and medical condition. |
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Looking for ALL families who’ve had a trisomy child of any number.
Whether you terminated, miscarriage, had a stillbirth, live birth -
living or deceased. Including adoptive and Foster parents. Please fill
out the
TRIS survey
to help update the medical literature and to improve the quality and
availability of medical care. Tracking Rare
Incidence Syndromes (TRIS)
Click here to add your information |
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