Fairburn, Georgia (GA)

Lisa and Terrill Raspberry, parent's to our beautiful baby girl,
She was born on Aug. 18, 2005 and died on Aug. 21, 2005.

We reside in Fairburn, Georgia.

E-Mail and Web Address
traz@bellsouth.net

Date: Wed Sep 28, 2005
Subject: Our love for Trinnity

Today is kind of tough because Trinnity would have been a month old. I feel like this entire week is going to be painful and slow. The 21st will be a month since she died; the 23rd was my due date; and I have to go for my postpartum check up on the 26th.

I would like to share with you an over view of my pregnancy, I still have lots of questions. I have two son's; a 3 yr old and 20 mth old. I experienced preterm labor with both and had to be placed on home monitoring and Terbutaline SQ continuously and bed rest. I had the exact thing occur when I was pregnant with, Trinnity. I saw my primary OB and a perinatalogist because I had cervical shortening along with contractions. I didn't find my treatment this pregnancy any different than my previous pregnancies, this was normal for me.

I was told at my 26th wk perinatologist appt. that she was measuring small in her abdominal girth. Then, I was told to drink milkshakes. Mind you , I was getting U/S at each and every appt. I went to my appts and was told that she was fine. At 30 wks, I was told that I would have a NST at my next appt. This was the 1st time that my husband and I saw some of her face. We were excited because she never showed her face completely. It seemed like no big deal because the physicians weren't concerned. BY my 32 wk peri appt., the u/s tech, stopped in the middle of my u/s and said the doctor would see me and possibly redo my u/s. He didn't, he told me see you in 2 wks everything is fine. He didn't even give me the chance to sit down and ask him any questions. I figured no news is good news and went home. My 34 wk appt, the same tech did my u/s and did the same thing. This time the same doctor that told me to drink milkshakes came into the room. She had me go to her office and told me something about the readings on the doppler indicated that the pressure between the umbilical cord and placenta was measuring a 6 instead of a 3. GO straight to the hospital.

I got to the hospital, the same doctor remeasured everything with the placenta and umbilical cord, it was normal readings. Then she drops the bomb on me and my husband. She tells us that she saw a cyst on her brain and calcification on her heart. She said it could be an indication for Down's and Dandy Walker cyst. This was the first time that we were told that there was something abnormal with our baby. My primary OB, then tells me that he would recommend I get an amnio. Okay, why all of this now. It would take 7-10 days for the results. I felt that we would decide about that he following day with the other test they were going to do. All of my previous labs were normal, the normal ones that they check for. Nothing suggested that I needed further testing, so they say. It just amazes me that the peri doctor all of a sudden saw this stuff.

I ended up having lots of decels and had to have an emergency section. She cried when she was born and then that was the last time she cried. I saw her for 5 minutes before they transferred her. My husband and I were told of her t13 diagnosis, one day after she was born. She didn't have a left eye (the orbit never developed), small cloudy right eye, small opening in right orbit. There were some heart defects, omphalocele(minor and was repaired), right rocker bottom foot, small head, small brain, fluid on her brain, hyperconvex fingers, and other things. I'm in the process of requesting her medical records. The geneticist and neonatalogist asked us if we were ever informed of my baby's condition. NO! We were then told that it takes 3 physician signature to remove life support due to this being a condition that is "incompatible with life". We knew we didn't want her to suffer, so our goal was to get her home. We had her taken off of all medical interventions at 6:15 p.m. on 08/20. We spent the most precious time with her and I wouldn't trade it for the world. She past on 08/21, and we were left with the task of planning her funeral.

I was asked if I would have had a therapeutic abortion, if they told me of her condition. There is nothing therapeutic about an abortion. He told me that there would not have been a difference in the outcome.

My entire pregnancy, I was told that my baby was 'well'. Where is my 'well' baby because 'well' baby's come home with their mothers. I was told to request a meeting to get answers. I plan on doing that, when I get a little stronger.

I'm 30 and praying for more healthy children, I would love to have a little sister for Trinnity here on earth with me. Keep me and my family in your prayers.
Lisa