Parents-Ashley and Adam Barker
We lost our son Kaden on August 30, 2007. It has taken me some time to be
able to tell his story. I just never knew what to say, or could find the
right words. I have visited this website many times since I found out Kaden
had Trisomy 13 and it has helped me tremendously. Now I hope by telling our
story we can help other people.
On July 25, we had our first ultrasound. Everything seemed fine. It took the
technician awhile because he
was moving around so much. He was always very active from the very
beginning. At 8 A.M. on August 1, I got
the dreaded phone call that something was wrong and I needed to come in
right away. My heart just dropped,
but I never imagined that I would get the news that I did. I was told that
Kaden had a severe heart problem, extra fingers, extra toes, cleft lip and
pallet and at the most he would live would be a couple hours. Well
obviously, I was in complete shock. A week later I was sent to a specialist
and he confirmed that Kaden had full Trisomy 13. I was presented with the
decision to either terminate the pregnancy or to go through with it. It was
never a hard decision. There was no way I would terminate the pregnancy. I
put my complete trust in God. Besides, I figured a couple hours with him was
better than nothing. I tried to cherish every moment I had with him. Every
kick and every movement was the best feeling in the world. Every night I
prayed to God to please not let him suffer and to just let us hold and see
him.
God answered my prayers, because on August 30 at 12:13 A.M., Kaden was born
stillborn. He didn’t make it
full term. His heart just was not strong enough. I can’t explain what it
felt like to see and hold him. He was just so perfect in my eyes. He weighed
1 lb. 2 ozs. and was 10 inches long. His extra toes and finger just seemed
right.
Giving him up was the hardest thing I have ever done and I hope ever
have to do. I am so thankful to have my husband and family. I don’t know
what I would have done without them. I know that Kaden is an angel in Heaven
and will always be with me. I have always felt lucky to have had Kaden for
the time that I did and I would not give it up for anything. I miss him
every day and I know that will never change, but I look forward to seeing
him again one day.
I can be contacted at:
Ashleyj_9@yahoo.com
Here is a video I made of Kaden
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Ironman
for Kids - The Living with Trisomy 13 Community thanks Michael
Hennessey for helping to raise awareness for Trisomy 13 and other
related disorders. 
