My husband, Barry, and I found out we were pregnant on December 6, 2005. This was our first pregnancy so we were both filled with excitement and nervousness. We had always wanted a little girl named Kambry, so as soon as we found out we were pregnant, that is what we called the baby. Everything went so smooth. I never had morning sickness or anything. I was pregnant, but I didn't really have any of the pregnancy symptoms that I had always heard about.

We went in on March 16, 2006 to have a Level I ultrasound done. We were so excited because we knew that we would be finding out if we were having a boy or a girl. Well, it was confirmed that we were indeed having a little Kambry in our lives, but the doctor also mentioned that there was fluid on her brain. She said "Don't worry. I am sure it is nothing, but I just want you two to get it checked to be sure." Yeah right. Not worry! Who was she kidding? I went home immediately and got online to see what "fluid in the brain" was all about. Barry works at the hospital so he got with all of his friends and asked them what it meant as well.

From everything I read and everyone that Barry talked to, it sounded like it was nothing to worry about. That if she did have fluid on her brain it would be fixable. Barry and I had an appointment scheduled with a perinatologist the following Monday, but we really had figured that everything would be fine so we had a great weekend and even bought a few baby clothes and paid off the baby crib.

Monday, March 20, 2006 (19 weeks gestation), finally rolled around and we saw Dr. Albert. He did what they call a Level II ultrasound. It was 45 minutes long. When he was finished, he put his hand on my leg and said "You won't remember much of what I am about to tell you so I am going to have someone write it down as I talk." I knew immediately that this wasn't going to be good. I looked over at Barry and he had the same look as I did. Just complete shock and worry...and this was even before the doctor had told us anything. He went on to tell us that Kambry had Alobar Holoprosencephayl, Tetrology of Fallot, and cleft lip/palate. He said he suspected that she had Trisomy 13. I had never heard of this before. He also went on to say that the diagnosis was "lethal". I just sat there. I could hardly even cry. I was in total shock. It hit me like a brick wall. There are no words to fully describe the hurt. After the doctor left the room, Barry and I just held each other and cried. Our drive home was very sad. Dr. Albert told us we could do an amnio to confirm the Trisomy 13 so we did the next day.

The results came in the following Friday that Kambry did have Full Trisomy 13. As you can imagine, the next several days were spent online doing as much research as I possibly could about Trisomy 13. I knew that the next 5 months of my pregnancy would be long and hard. Barry and I continued to pray every night that the Lord be with us and we kept thanking Him for our wonderful little blessing. We knew that even though she wasn't "perfect" in the world's eyes, she was perfect in His eyes and in ours. We loved her so much and still couldn't wait to meet her and see her precious little face. Telling all of our friends and family about Kambry's diagnosis was hard.

There is supposed to be so much joy surrounding the birth of a baby, but it was almost as if the joy was sucked away for the first couple of weeks. Having to tell everyone that Kambry would probably die was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I felt so alone. It was almost as if people didn't believe me. There were times when I felt like I was being abandoned. No one fully understood the magnitude of my hurt, nor did I want them to really. I wouldn't wish this on anyone so I was glad that no one knew what it felt like. But it made some days very tough. I would take breaks at work and just go into a room and cry and talk to God and ask him the famous "why's". But in the same breath, I could never stop thanking Him enough for what He had given me. He didn't have to give me a baby at all...but He did! The rest of the pregnancy had its ups and downs.

Barry and I supported each other 100% and we were there for each other through everything. On July 10, 2006 I started having contractions. They were getting pretty regular, so I went to the hospital. They told me I was dialating, but not very well. They gave me two options. I could either "labor it out" which could take days and put a lot of stress on Kambry (lowering our chances of her being born alive), or we could help speed up the process using Pitocin. Barry and I opted to do the Pitocin. Kambry's heartbeat stayed so strong throughout the whole laboring process. I kept thinking that she was going to pop out and be perfectly healthy. I couldn't imagine her being "broken"...she was doing so well.

Kambry Danielle was born on July 12, 2006 at 12:54pm. She weighed 4 lbs 11 oz and was 17 1/4 inches long. When they laid her on my chest, she was wiggling her little arms! I just cried so many tears of joy!!! Kambry was alive and I was going to get to meet her! I had been praying that prayer all along! She was grunting and I could tell she couldn't breath well. But when she was laying on my chest, she just seemed so peaceful. We had 4 wonderful hours and 21 precious minutes with her. The most fulfilling hours of my life were the hours I spent with her. There was nothing but love in that hospital room. Love from family, friends, and hospital staff. Kambry felt nothing but the love in that room all the hours of her life. I found an organization online called Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. (http://www.nilmdts.org) They are a non-profit organization that uses professional photographers to take pictures of families and their babies in situations where the babies will not have long to live. I had a lady name Brandi take pictures of our little family. She did an AMAZING job and I strongly suggest anyone use this site to find a photographer that can be there for you too. Here is a link to the slideshow photos they took of us:
http://www.raynaphotography.com/kambry%20slideshow%20page.htm

It’s hard to put into words how my daughter has changed me. Kambry has taught me so much about love and life. Her heart was so pure and her love was so strong that she only needed 4 hours and 21 minutes on this earth to do the works that our Lord had planned for her. I admire her so much and only wish to be more like her. She loved everyone for who they were…without judging them. She showed me to love often, love more, and love deeper. Over 150 other people have written me to tell me how Kambry has impacted them. I am so proud of her and I am so thankful and blessed that God allowed ME to be her mom.

Our God is an awesome God. I couldn’t have asked for more. I am saddened because I miss my little Kambry, but I smile because she is my little Kambry. The scenery of our lives has changed, but it is still a beautiful picture. After all, it continues to be in the hands of the same Designer. Not many people get to say that they had the chance to hold an angel…not only did I get the chance to hold one, but I was blessed to be the mother of one. You will forever be loved Kambry!

Kambry Danielle Tolbert
Born on July 12th, 2006 @ 12:54pm
Grew her little wings on July 12th, 2006 @ 5:15pm
Weighed 4 lbs 11 oz and was 17 1/4 inches long.  
 
Kambry lived 4 hours and 21 minutes. We have tons of pictures and even were able to do some hand molds.  We feel very blessed and will update soon with the rest of the information!!
 
~Kimber and Barry Tolbert

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Kambry was diagnosed with Full Trisomy 13 on March 20th at 19 weeks gestation.  

Like so many other stories, the doctors tried to get us to terminate the pregnancy.  That just wasn't an option for us because we know that God blessed us with our little girl and we weren't going to be the ones to decide when her time was to leave.

I am so glad that we have continued on because all the kicks and squirms and wiggles just make me smile and brighten my day.

I can't imagine not having her be a part of my life.  I know there is still a lot ahead of us, but I can't wait to meet her!

Sachse, Tx

Kimber Tolbert  Kimber.Tolbert@atmosenergy.com
(Husband: Barry Tolbert, married for 2 years, this is our first baby. Kambry is due on August 13th )

June 26, 2006

I have found during this experience that a lot of people will try to tell you what the best decisions are and what you are doing is wrong.  It is surprising that there are still negative people in this world even in a time like this. The closer it has gotten to my due date, the more people start judging me and my choices for my baby acting as if they know exactly how I feel.  Last weekend, I found out that a lot of my “friends” were taking my pain and using it to judge me…that has inspired the following quote that I wrote.  I want to share this with all of you so that when/if you find yourself in the same situation as me, you can share this with those that are being hateful towards you.
 
"Never use someone's sadness as an opportunity to judge; instead, live a moment in their sadness and use it as an opportunity to grow.  Only then has it made a positive impact on your life."  ~ Kimber Tolbert
 
God has blessed each one of these babies.  And each family that carries one of these babies has been blessed tremendously as well.  

Thank you so much!  
Kimber Tolbert